Grab ’em at the Go!

The Mickey Malone MysteriesIf you’ve been reading here then you know that I am studying with James Patterson as I write the next in the Mickey Malone Mystery series. It’s exhilarating. It stirs up all kinds of ideas down the dark alleys I never thought to explore inside my imagination.

Now, although I am fifteen chapters into the next book right now, our assignment in class today was to write five opening lines for the same story. I would love to get your feedback. Please comment below on what you think.

1. In those quiet places, where no one can see us, we do things, little things, scary things, things we don’t want a soul to know.

2. We can get away with it most of the time, in the dark, at the edge of reason, where we exist in the blackness.

3. She held the knife for so long that her hand cramped.

4. She made her way to the edge of the platform, minding the gap, coffee in hand, as if leaning precariously over the tracks to look for the next train would make it arrive any faster.

5. Her skin prickled with a cool breeze as she sat in the glow of the sun. The eeriness of the sensation heightened her radar as she turned toward the main house.